To Please Other People
by Friends of Godwin
We have given such power and energy to other people. Our happiness and our unhappiness are dependent on what other people think of us. We all have this tendency. Most of the time we are trying to please other people. We do this because we are starving for the plusses of other people. Over time we have developed this dependency which manifests in whatever we are doing. It is like being dependent on a toy we would like to get, and only when we get it do we feel that we are really happy.
When I meet such people I feel very sad about them. They are trying their best, but of course they are not getting enough plusses. They can never be satisfied with the plusses they get. Then they try more, and the more they are trying the less successful they are, and they end up suffering. They give themselves minuses and they feel rejected. These aspects are very important in relationships, because our happiness and our unhappiness are really dependent on how we relate to ourselves and how we relate to others. What is important to realise is that we need friendliness, self-confidence, self-esteem. We are not giving enough to ourselves. We are suffering from a kind of lack, and we try to cover it up by creating a dependency on other people.