A Learning Experience

We should learn from our unpleasant emotions and make them a learning experience – but how do we know whether what we have learnt from the unpleasant experience is right or wrong?

Very simple answer: without resisting, if you can say okay and make friends with it, that’s it. To put it in other words: when we have unpleasant emotions the normal tendency is to suffer as a result of it, but here by taking them as learning experiences we learn not to suffer and to see them as our teachers and feel grateful for them, because if they do not arise, how can we learn to work with them?

Trying too Hard

When you are meditating perhaps you are trying too hard, and maybe you are trying to breathe in a different way. When one tries to breathe in an unusual or different way it may be a strain on the lungs. So it is very important when we are meditating, to learn to meditate in a very relaxed way, not to try too hard. If you try too hard it can be a strain on the body and also the mind. So please try to sit in a very relaxed way and don’t put a strain on any part of the body.

If pain comes, stop focusing on breathing and send thoughts of loving-kindness, friendliness, gentleness to that part of your body.

Breathe Naturally

Allow the body to breathe naturally. If you try to breathe with some particular part of your body, that is not allowing the body to breathe naturally.

It is very important to learn to allow the body to breathe naturally. Then when the body is breathing naturally you’re just being conscious of the breathing, that is all. It is like when we are doing walking meditation, we just allow the body to walk and we are just being aware of walking. We don’t try to walk in a different way. So in meditation it is very important to learn to be natural, not to interfere with the natural process of what is happening when we are meditating whether it is walking, breathing or whatever.

Whatever Happens

We have to be open to learn from whatever happens to you. Learning to see everything as part of the practice. So whether you get angry, whether you get annoyed, when you are reacting, just observe that and see how you are creating suffering for yourself from what others are doing. So in that situation the anger is the object of meditation. Then you learn to make that the object of meditation and see how far you can let go of that anger.

There are unpleasant experiences we have, physically and mentally. So just knowing them and making friends with them is a very important aspect of the practice. If you can practise in this way anything can be a learning experience, anything can be a meditation. So if you can have that openness, then without getting angry with your neighbour, you feel grateful for this person because he or she is giving you an opportunity to work with anger. The person who is annoying you, irritating you becomes your teacher at that time. It is a beautiful way to live.

Walking

The idea behind walking meditation is walking consciously. Walk slowly and just be mindful of your walking. When you walk you have to feel the different sensations in the body while you are walking. Thoughts will come but please learn to let go of the thoughts and come back to the present, that is the walking.

Whatever you are doing, please do it slowly, consciously, with mindfulness.

Walk slowly, consciously. Feeling the sensations in your feet. Using walking to experience the present moment.

Keep your hands in front.

Walk slowly so that you can be conscious of all the movements and sensations in your body when you are walking.

Let go of your thoughts and come back to the present with the help of walking. Just walking in a very relaxed way.

Learning to enjoy the simple act of walking.

When you are lifting your feet know that you are lifting your feet.

Just feel the earth with your feet.

Learning to relax with your walking. Learning to walk consciously.

Can you walk as if you are walking on lotus flowers, gently, tenderly – just being conscious of each step?

Yoga

I would like to make a few points about the connection between meditation and yoga. One thing is that when you do yoga you learn to be aware, mindful of your body, you learn to relax your body, you learn to be friendly and kind towards the body, you learn to use yoga exercises to experience the present moment. These are some aspects of yoga in connection with meditation.

Visions

Seeing visions reflects different phases in the practice. Sometimes these visions, these pictures you see are very pleasant, sometimes they are very unpleasant. Whether it is pleasant or unpleasant just know that you are seeing something, that you are having this experience, without thinking: Is it abnormal? Is it normal? If you react in that way you are getting involved with what is happening. So what you need to do is not to get involved but just to know, just to say okay and then after some time the sensation will stop.

Learn about our Thoughts

Do we have more thoughts about the past? Do we have more thoughts about the future? Why do I have more thoughts about the past? What happens when I think about the future? Do I have anxiety? This is why we have to find out, learn about our thoughts and how the thoughts can create emotions and how they can create suffering. This is a very important aspect of the practice. So it is not only stopping thoughts but understanding, learning, discovering about them.

Negative Thoughts

Most thoughts are either about ourselves or about others. And sometimes the thoughts are negative about yourself, negative about others; so it’s just to know how we are having negative thoughts about ourselves and others and how when we have such negative thoughts emotions are created. So these are very important insights to develop by watching thoughts.

Make Friends with Thoughts

When thoughts come we should be aware, mindful that thoughts are coming, and make friends with them, not to have a conflict, and then come back to the breath. But we can be aware of the breath for a few minutes, then again thoughts will come. This is the nature of the mind, that we don’t have much control. So meditation is understanding how our minds work, making friends with our mind and whatever is happening, and training ourselves to slowly, gently come back to the breath.

It is very important even when we are not sitting to continue to be aware and mindful of the thoughts that we are having. Even while relaxing, while eating, we are having thoughts. So whatever we are doing it’s a very good practice to be conscious of our thoughts, not only when we are meditating. We can learn a great deal about our thoughts by just watching them, just asking: What are the thoughts that I’m having?